I Slaughtered My King

While in corporate prayer the other day, the Holy Spirit fixed my mind on the gruesome, nauseating death of Jesus. Piercing images of the calamity flashed through my mind from start to finish. As if those dark images weren’t enough, the Holy Spirit made it far more personal by reminding me of my part in the death of our Savior; how it was MY SIN that caused the Wrath of God to fall on Christ. It was my sin that caused Christ’s pain, humiliation and death; sin that I commit daily, sin that I, at times, am very nonchalant about.

Later we will discuss Jesus’s final hours on earth, but first let’s lay a foundation for who Jesus is by reading John 1:1-3 & 1:14.

Some major points to highlight from these scriptures are:

  • Jesus was here from the beginning, with God and as God. They were ALWAYS together in perfect union.
  • Everything was created through Him.
  • The Word, Jesus, who is God, (verse 1), took on flesh and dwelt among us, (verse 14)


Why did the Son of God leave Heaven where there is no pain, no tears, no struggle, no heartache, no sense of brokenness, no sickness or disease to come down to earth where all those things roam freely? Even greater, why would he come AND be crucified? Two reasons were because of His loyalty to His Father and His Love for US.

For our sake He made Him to be Sin who knew no sin.

It starts in the Garden of Gethsemane. Being God, Jesus knew from the beginning what His mission was, yet as the time crept closer, so did the reality of what was to come. As thoughts of the wrath of God being poured out on him began to plague Him, He was filled with an agony that was so consuming that it caused our loving Savior, to sweat drops of blood (Luke 22:4), known today as hematidrosis. In Matthew 26:38 Jesus says, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death.”

Going a little farther, he fell on his face and prayed, saying, “My Father if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.” (Matthew 26:39). A disturbing picture comes into my head when I think about Jesus, our Savior, suffering to the extent of not being able to walk because of agony.

Soon after, a “great crowd with swords” lead by Judas came and arrested Jesus. They brought Him before the High Priest where he was put on trial by mere man, who he created, whom He gave life to. Next, while standing in front of Pilate, Jesus sits silently as the crowd calls for Him to be crucified in the place of a deserving murderer.

After being sentenced to crucifixion, Roman soldiers toyed with Jesus as if he was an object. They began ripping off His clothes until he was completely naked to the public. They insultingly dressed Him in a scarlet robe and a crown made of sharp thorns. They put a reed in his right hand and kneeled before him mocking him saying, “Hail King of Jews!” Man Mocking God. They spit on Him! Most have never been spit on and even the idea of it makes us cringe. You spit on dirt. You spit on grass. Yet Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, The Alpha and Omega, was SPIT on. Then with the reed they beat the crown of thorns deeper into the head of our King.

                     . . Because of My Sin.

Prior to the crucifixion, Jesus was publicly scourged to the point where He no longer looked human, (Isaiah 52:14). His skin hung like red ribbon from his jagged bones. Fearful that he would bleed out and die “too early,” the Roman soldiers hung Him on the cross.

Pulling Jesus’s dangling arms as far apart as they could, they hammered nails into each of our Lord and Savior’s wrist. They overlapped his already battered feet and hammered a nail through them. As they stood up the cross, the crowd, who once watched Him heal the sick and raise the dead, mocked Him and cheered at the sight of His struggle. Roman history explains how those in the front row of the crucifixion would be murderers, robbers, and rapists who were placed there to bring more humiliation to those being crucified.

Now we have Jesus, the only hope for our salvation, disfigured and mocked, hanging on a cross struggling for every breath. As He hangs there taking on Himself every one of our sins, God has no choice but to separate from Him. The perfect union Jesus always had with God was at that very moment broken. Us believers yearn for the Abba relationship with God, it is everything to us; yet Jesus who did nothing wrong was stripped from His Father, from His presence, from His love, from His strength, from all that God is and instead was covered in darkness and all of humanity’s sins. Jesus covered in MY sin, suffered death. The giver of life suffered death.

As I meditated on the things above, it made the cost of my sin that much more real. I caused Jesus, who knew no sin, so much agony and pain. He absorbed the Wrath of God that I deserved. Jesus poured out His unmeasurable love upon us and I thank God so much for it!

I’ve realized my sin for the most part fits in two boxes. One box is sin that truly brings me grief that I repent from. The other box is sin that I commit that I just look over with this mindset of “it’s not a big deal.” I hate that mindset now. Jesus didn’t die for the sins that I determined to be a big deal. Jesus died for ALL sin. Every lie, every time I’ve stolen something, every time I’ve used God’s name in vain, every time I’ve cursed, etc.

Thoughts that could be going through your mind are “No one is perfect” or “Does he understand Grace?” As far as no one being perfect I can’t agree enough. It’s very evident in my own life. As far as understanding grace, I know that it’s only by the grace of God that Christ came, died and rose again, giving those who have faith in him and repent of their ways, eternal life in Heaven!

With that being said, have we allowed the magnificent free gift of God to make us complacent or indifferent when it comes to sin? Have we used our imperfections as an excuse to nonchalantly sin and perverted the merciful gift of grace to try and justify it? Not only do I take sin too lightly but I unintentionally have become my own judge in deciding what sins I should repent from. My prayer is that we look at ALL sin across the board with hatred and disgust. That we ask God to open our eyes to the sin in our lives and by His mighty authority, allow Him to give us the strength to overcome it! All the while trusting that His grace is so sufficient, but truly avoiding that which reminds us of the Holy blood on our hands.

“O you who love the LORD, hate evil! He preserves the lives of his saints; he delivers them from the hand of the wicked.” Psalm 97:10.

One thought on “I Slaughtered My King

  1. My friend, I stopped to read this post and I find myself with a heavy heart. Oh how He loves us! I saw this picture of an actor, that played Jesus in the passion movie, sitting with Mel Gibson. I stopped in awe. It had nothing to do with Mel Gibson, but to look at this picture with Jesus beaten and bloodied sitting with this director put things in a different perspective for me. Jesus, beaten for me, bloodied for me, killed for me because of the love for me. Thank you for sharing your heart and thoughts. I look forward to following your post!

    Liked by 1 person

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